ZantiMissKnit

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Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Update on that $%^@*# sweater!

I really shouldn't curse the sweater. It is a lovely, well-intended sweater and has not given me any trouble at all to make -- the instructions were clear and the yarn is smooth as butter to knit with. The title of this post should be "I'm a $%^@*# Knitter!" or "Sweater Says: 'I Wish That $%^@*# Knitter Would Finish Me Already".

No, the sweater isn't finished yet. And I have no one to blame but myself, for I am purposely stalling.

I do this ALL.THE.TIME. I get nearly finished with a project, and I put it aside. All because I am afraid of what the results will be. I am afraid that this sweater will suck. And suck bad. I am afraid that it will be too big in some spots, yet I will be barely able to fasten the button in the bottom ribbing, and have a huge, blousy, bat-winged 80s disaster that can only be saved by humungous shoulder pads, rather than the cute little 60s cardigan I intend it to be. I am afraid that I will not be able to tighten up the buttonholes neatly, and will have nasty-looking, irregular holes in the front of the sweater. I am afraid that the fact that the buttonholes are NOT a perfect 3" (or was it 4"?) apart from each other will be painfully obvious. I am afraid that I will do a crappy job finishing it, and it will be lopsided.

I am afraid --- oh so afraid -- that the only comments I get will be a down-the-nose glance, with the question, "Oh, did you knit that sweater?". Rather than, "Where did you get that sweater?" (the ultimate compliment!)

So, I stalled. I have it. With me. Today. Or at least the final sleeve of it, sitting under my desk, neglected during my lunch break. Tomorrow I can work on it at Stitch n Bi --- oops, SnB (gotta learn my place! Sew Fast Sew Easy *owns* those words now, or so it seems) -- yeah, at SnB, and sheepishly admit that I have not finished yet. I'm going to attempt to bring it with me to Puerto Rico, in the hopes of finishing the knitting (the 2nd sleeve and the neckline! Honest!), and hope my #9s don't get taken away by the USAir security personnel.

Other Projects:

Pencil skirt -- still sitting up in the craft room. Neglected. It will probably only take an hour or so to stitch up, too. I give myself until March 10 -- the Muck and the Mires CD release party -- to finish that. Yeah, go ahead and throw stones at me and call me a sewing poseur. I deserve it.

Craftster February Birthday Swap -- Well, the cat is out of the bag that I am making a "subversive stuffie" for Sweetpie_Press. She just doesn't know what I looks like. I don't know if she ever visits my blog, so all I will say is that it involves sewing AND knitting, and I plan on working on the knitting segment in PR on my downtime from catching green anoles and coquii frogs, and should have it in the mail to her by the 16th.

Craftster Dr. Seuss Swap -- I signed up today for it. I should be assigned a partner over the weekend, and it needs to be mailed by March 2 (I think???).

Craftster Reptile Swap -- I plan on organizing this at the end of February/beginning of March.

Boston Craft Mafia -- I'm hoping to start this up soon! I get to be the President! Woo wheee! I'm bringing my sketchbook with me to PR (so I have something to do when I'm not catching green anoles and coquii frogs, knitting, or reading on the beach -- have I mentioned we are only going for THREE DAYS? Do I know how to overpack, or what? Do you know I am going to have THREE pairs of shoes for those THREE DAYS? Yes, I'm high.) Okay. . . So, I want to make up a Boston Craft Mafia logo. I've only come up with goofy ideas, like a lobster holding knitting needles and paint brushes, or a pot of baked beans with all kinds of craft supplies sticking out of it. The other idea was the statue of Paul Revere, and have him holding craft supplies (and maybe have some paintbrushes sticking out of the horse's mouth). Someone please kick me now. Or help me with this logo.

When I'm back from PR, I'll let y'all know that I didn't do everything that I planned on doing on my trip, because I decided instead to eat a shitload of food and drink like the she-demon I am. And hang out with Mr. ZantiMissKnit (ZantiMisterKnit?), a/k/a Mr. Saturday Night (tm: Joe Tampoff), and let him ply me with delicious rum drinks and drunkenly chase coquii frogs and green anoles.

Oh yeah -- and the Pattern-A-Day week review will be late this week. Maybe I'll get to it . . . Um . . . Tuesday. Maybe Tuesday. Okay?

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