YO! ZMK Knits!

Saturday, August 12, 2006

I just crocheted a nipple!

I'm not kidding.

I taught myself how to crochet in a circle, and I obviously need more practice because it came out looking just like a nipple.

ZantiMisterKnit is providing the necessary tweakage for realism. I once found a book in my parents' attic called "Sex, Danish Style" (or something like that) and the cover had a finger ever-so-lightly touching an erect nipple. This crocheted circle immediately made me think of that book. There are other, ahem, books (and magazines) stashed away up there in a trunk, but that's a post for another day. All I will say is Denmark + the 70s = hair aprons. Ewwww. Thank you, Venus Vibrance!

This is my practice for crochet class with the fabulous Kristin:

It's terribly exciting, isn't it? Hey, I am making some progress and know how to change colors. I like the quickness of crochet, but I don't think I have fully gotten the hang of it (as evidenced by the nipple above. I think I was too tight in my early stitches, which caused the nipplage).

I also would like to show off the froggy feet bootie in all it's not-so-greatness:
It looks okay here, right? It looks kind of like how it should, right?

But look at it from the side:

Argh! More holes than the plot of a late-night made-for-tv erotic thriller! I really need to work on those picked up stitches. There is no way I can give this to someone as a present, especially someone who has taken my hair to great fabulousness for ten years. Yuckadoo!

I was going to post a macro picture of something in my house for any blogstalkers on knittyboard to take a guess at, but guess what? Those fittas at blogger aren't letting me post any more pictures! So you are just going to have to laugh at my really bad crafts!


Blogger ZMrK said...

It should be noted that I work with a lot of chemicals and have some scarrage on my index finger there... it's not poor hygene making my index finger look haggard!

But YEAH... I loves me some yarn nipples!

7:54 AM  

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