I just got called "Devil Lady"!!! \m/
Let me set this story up: I am normally a very polite, peaceful person. I go out of my way to avoid any kind of confrontation. On rare occasions, however, something will push my buttons and cause me freak out* without any sort of warning.
The place: Haymarket, Boston, MA.
The time: A very busy Saturday afternoon.
On Fridays and Saturdays, a spot of Boston called "Haymarket" has produce stands set up, and produce distributors bring out the foods that the chain supermarkets didn't take. These are available at really cheap prices. Those cheap prices draw major crowds from all over the Boston area.
Some days I deal with Haymarket better than others. It's pretty annoying, as it's incredibly crowded and you can get pushed and shoved around. We gotta eat, though, and don't want to pay the equivalent of a down-payment on a house just for salad fixings and stir-fry, so it's off to Haymarket we go every week.
We were going along one corridor of it that has a brick building down the side. It had been raining this morning, and out of nowhere, a bunch of rain came down off an awning above us. One 20-something decided she was too much of a princess to get rainwater on her, and pushed me into the brick way to avoid it. Without even thinking, I shoved her away with one arm and yelled, "Get out of my way, BITCH!" and kept going.
We went along the rest of the corridor, and when we passed them on our way back (I think she was still standing where she landed after the push), ZantiMisterKnit heard the words "devil lady" come out of her mouth. He told me, "She just called you devil lady!" and I said, "Devil lady? That's AWESOME!!!!!"
Once in a while, you have to be a bitch. Or a Devil Lady. :-)
*There are two other instances I can think of where I went from Zero to Devil Lady in 2 seconds. One was about 8-9 years ago, at a Southern Culture on the Skids show, a group of college idiots (3 guys and a woman, I think) decided they were going to "mosh" (you know, because SCOTS are such a moshable band). I wasn't near them, but the woman kept coming near me (whether it was on her own or her jock-itch friends flinging her towards me), and bumping into me, or stepping on my toes (I was wearing high-heeled mules too). Finally (and I don't even remember doing it, and I wasn't drunk), I guess I grabbed her by her ponytail, looked like I was using her head to change gears, and flung her away from me. I recall they stopped after that.
The other instance is less exciting. I was a passenger in the car, ZMrK was driving, we were heading down the street the turns onto ours, some douchebag in a minivan comes out of a side street looking to her right (we were coming on the left), and I just yelled out "LOOK!!!!" in a really forceful, death-metal sounding voice. It was summer all the windows were down. I don't think it's nearly as funny as ZMrK does.
A woman we know, JoAnn, is even better at going from zero to Devil Lady. Her fiance works with ZMrK and is always coming in with stories. She called him from the train one day to touch base with him re: some work they were getting done on their home. Mid-conversation, she yells, "What the hell are you looking at? Go read your book!". I guess someone gave her a dirty look on the train for talking on the phone. It's funny 'cuz it wasn't me (I've given people dirty looks for talking really loudly on the phone. I've yelled at people to shut the hell up when they are talking really loudly on the phone.)
Like I said, sometimes you really need to be a Devil Lady.