Alrighty then!

I scared y'all off, didn't I?

I told you I've known some pretty interesting characters.

Storytime!!!!

I promised you stories, so here's one. Sit back, open a beer, and read on. . .

I had a friend in New Orleans that I will call G. G was a tall, kinda lanky kid of about 22 who usually wore his hair parted and slicked back, and looked like a young Robert Mitchum. He also had this reeaaalllllllly sllllllllllllow Southern draaaaaawlllll and held his head to one side most of the time when he spoke. I had no clue as to whether he was ever sober when I saw him.

One day I happened to see G and he was sporting a rather large lump on his forehead.

"What the hell happened to you?" I asked.

"Awwwww, my girrrrrlfrieeeeend hit me in the heaaaaad with a baaaaaalll peen hammerrrrrrr," was G's response.

Alarmed and intrigued at the same time, I asked, "Why in the world would she do a thing like that?"

"She saaaaaaaaaid I stuck my fingerrrrrrr up her butt. I probahbleeeeee did. I was pretty druuuuunnnnnnnk."

* * * *

Another time, G was wasted and took a header in the Verde Mart (name of a convenience store) in the French Quarter. He just passed out. His friends got him out of there, no problem, then they went back to the store to try to talk the clerk into giving them the surveillance tape so they could watch it over and over again. I'm sorry I missed that one.

Spinning Stuff!

The other night, I wound my most recent 2 ply into a pretty yarn cake.





I also knit up a swatch with it.



Sorry for the crap-ass picture. My camera was being moody last night.

I'd love to make socks with this (I have about 400 yards in 3 separate skeins), but I'm afraid of their durability. This yarn is . . . hm, how should I put it? This yarn is not even. In some sections it is around a heavy fingering weight, in others near lace. I can probably work things so the lighter weight parts are nowhere near the danger zones on my feet -- heels and toes. I also probably could double up the yarn in the thin parts. I washed the swatch this morning, and will measure it when it's dry. If not socks, what else should I make with it?

I also started another spinning project over the weekend.



It's this stuff that I got at the CT Sheep and Wool Fest. Corriedale, merino, and silk, I think, with gold tinsel thrown in there. It's really soft and smells nice.

I had some friends help me out with this weekend's spinning.





The Abita Jockamo is pure perfection. I love Abita, and I love IPAs, so it makes sense that I love an Abita IPA!

The Monty Python beer has a great cap though.



I'm not sure if I kept the cap or not, but it would make a great magnet or a button. Back in my wild youth, us punk rockers used to wear beer caps on our leather jackets. Oh yeah, I owe you stories, don't I? I'm such a tease. I have one in mind, but it's a little racy for me to type out on my blog while I'm at work. . . keystrokes and such. Do companies really keep track of that stuff? Well, not racy, but indicative of some of the degenerates I've hung out with over the years. I'll do that this weekend, because I'd hate to keep mentioning it and have y'all be disappointed when I finally start telling stories. I'm going to aim for one story a week, as the mood hits me. Okay?

Oh! I got these really cute stitch markers too!



Tree frogs!!!



Snakes!!!



Turtles!!!

Check out this little trucking turtle dude:



(Pay no attention to the black cats hairs underneath said trucking turtle dude.)

Aren't they adorable?? I got them from an Etsy seller called Yarn Lust, who has many more that are just as cute!!!

Oh, yeah, I also got more yarn lately. I blame my downstream Secret Pal, because every time I buy something for her, I buy something for me.

I was purchasing "things" for her from KnitPicks and decided to pull the trigger on one of the laceweight samplers. If only I could knit lace as fast as I can purchase laceweight! Here they are:








I don't know which is which right now, so I'll come back and tag them later!

I also purchased some tweedy sock yarn:



And, because my total was something like $48.10 and $50 gets one free shipping, I went trolling through the clearance and found this laceweight for $1.99.



Considering how much fiber and yarn you know I already have, and how long it takes me to knit anything, much less lace, you'd think I'd be done, right?

Wrong.







(the 1st and 2nd pics, and the 3rd and 4th, are both respectively of the same yarns. . . just so you know there was only three yarns in that purchase.)

A local yarn shop, Mind's Eye, was having an anniversary sale so I strolled in and bought the above. I've since made another purchase at another LYS, Newbury Yarns, but I don't even have pictures of those yet.

I think I may only buy equipment at Rhinebeck, like carders and stuff. No fiber. Do you think that's feasable for me? Or should I just make 2009 my "yarn diet" year?

This is why I don't like sports

It's just a hat, ya douchebags. Get over it. There are more important things in life to get riled up about.

So, I suck

Remember back on April 2 when I put forth a challenge to use up something old in your stash?

Can you guess what I didn't do?

I think I'll just use the excuse that I can't even open up the yarn hutch right now without several bags of fiber fallling out. I know exactly where the yarn in question is, and I also know that all of the roving that I bought at the spring Sheep and Wool Fests is in front of it, so it can't taunt me.

Remember how I said I wasn't going to order yarn online this year, and only make in hand purchases?

I suck, part 2. I blame my secret pal. Everything I bought for her, I bought something for me as well.

Blogger. FAIL.
Knitter. FAIL.

So sue me.

I know I've really sucked ass at posting the past couple of months. Part of it is the lack of knitting content -- how many times can I show that Branching Out scarf progress without y'all wanting to throttle me? -- and part of it is me saying, "fuck, it's nice out -- I don't wanna waste time on the computer! Let's go out!"

We started going to last year's haunt, Ponkapoag Pond, in mid-May and have been trying to go every weekend. Saturday we spent six hours there. We walked around the pond (it's a 4.1 mile loop), and went down the boardwalk and back (about 1/4 mile each way) and took a couple of little side trails that were probably 1/8 - 1/4 mile each. Whew! It was a gorgeous day, so it was perfect. Some of that walk is uphill, and uphills always kill me.

We also went to a party last night at a friends' house. It was crazy crowded, and me, being socially awkward, drank probably more than I should have but still it was only about 3 beers. Then had a piece of cake. Thankfully I went to the party on a full stomach, or the damage could have been worse, but I felt like shit until about noon today. I should have reminded myself of the time I went out to a show at a bar in Allston, O'Brien's, on Halloween and had several beers and lots of candy -- stuff like Sweet Tarts (or was it Smarties)? I had this vile pure liquid grey/black puke the next day. I got off much easier this time around, maybe because I am ten years older and did not get stinking drunk, but the grey/black puke did come to mind. I'm definately too old for that shit.

Penny Karma left a comment on my blog saying she'd love to get drunk sometime and hear some of my stories. That has gotten me thinking -- should I make that a feature on my blog? Do y'all want to hear stories from my wild youth? Keep in mind that I've never done anything spectacular like be a superhero, but I have known some rather interesting people. I think my tolerance and my reserved nature (really -- don't laugh!) attracted the crazies. They always had an audience who wasn't going to be competition, you know? I've also worked with a few people who were out of their fucking minds too, and I'd like to tell those stories.

I do have something to share right now, but if you are someone who can't even look at a picture of a snake without freaking out, you just might want to leave this page now. The rest of you can scroll down.






I'm the Snake Whisperer.



Saturday I saw this guy by the path at the pond. I tried to catch him, and he got away, but on his second try ZMrK was able to catch him. He musked the shit out of ZMrK (and me, a little), but didn't bite. Musk is their defense -- they squirt out some really foul-smelling shit, and I guess it tastes nasty too, prompting the critter who presumably picked it up with its mouth to drop it.

He calmed right down, and when I took him, coiled onto my hand and more or less fell asleep. It was pretty crazy. He didn't even dart away when I put him down. ZMrK moved him to a more obscure area near where we found him, to let him wake up a bit before he got snatched by a hawk or something.

Pretty cute though, right?

OH, and Batty -- I'll be in touch with you about the knitting lunch date!